The Happy Place

[talon]

I found this list (and forgot where because I got distracted before I could mark the page) and naturally I have a rebuttal. I'll take it line by line, and add a concluding paragraph. The list is in italics, I'm not. Here goes:

It clutters our space, causing distractions and stress.

It fills our eyes and provides comfort and connection, calm and coziness, reminding us of our accomplishments and the accomplishments of our loved ones as well as our own creativity.

We must constantly move it to get to other stuff, to clean, to organize, to paint walls or decorate or remodel.

Unless we have nothing at all, we have to do this anyway. And who paints, decorates, and remodels all that often? Aren't having photos of the entire family, that comfy recliner, enough cozy seating for all your friends, that rack of DVDs and shelf of boxed games worth having even in the face of those few times when it all has to be moved for one thing or another?

We must take it with us if we move, and often if we travel. That's a ton of trouble and costs.

No, we don't. If it's easily replaceable, pass it on to someone who needs it, move with less stuff, re-acquire what you need. It's simple logic.

Often we pay for extra storage, outside in our yards or in storage facilities.

Of course I have storage in my yard for the lawn care tools, gardening supplies, bicycles and auto care tools I don't want inside the house, but I only pay for short term extra storage if I'm between homes, something I haven't had to do in 15 years. I can also see paying for an extra garage if you have a boating or RVing passion and need somewhere to store the boat or RV in the off seasons, or when separating and collecting the things your children will need when they move out, or the possessions of a loved one who died until you are ready to disperse their belongings, or if one is remodeling/painting/etc, or any of a variety of reasons. Having extra temporary storage is not a Bad Thing.

If it breaks, we will often take it to be repaired.

And how, precisely, is this bad? Doesn't getting it repaired and continuing to use it reduce our carbon footprint better than tossing it and buying a replacement? If we're willing to repair it, that means we're using it, and therefore it's not burdensome.

If we have kids or pets, we have to worry about it getting broken, or scold them for not being careful with it.

What, don't you teach your kids and pets manners and proper behavior? I have never had to worry about my kids and pets break things - visitors' kids and pets, yes, my own kids and pets, no.

If we get used to it, and it breaks, we'll replace it because we think we need it.

What do you mean "think"? If we're actively using it, if it allows us to do more and be more and it breaks, of course we'll either repair it, or, failing that, replace it.

If it gets old and crotchety, we have the headache of putting up with a less-than-functioning tool.

Really? I don't know what world you live in, but if it gets old and crotchety, it gets repaired, restored, or, if necessary, replaced. Why would we put up with a less-than-functional tool?

If we have too much stuff, it weighs us down, emotionally.

Perhaps some people feel that way, but many of us don't. I am not burdened by my things, I am freed and empowered by them. They allow me to do a great many more things other than sit around staring at a TV screen.

We get attached to our stuff, creating an emotional battle when we consider giving it up (whether we actually give it up or not).

Stuff is stuff. If I have to give it up, or it gets destroyed, I may have to spend money replacing it. That's why I carry the insurance I do, so I can afford to replace stuff destroyed in an accident or disaster. I may regret losing the antique beer stein set or my tea cup collection or my sewing machines and patterns (I'd really regret losing my patterns - they go all the way back to the 50's, when I started sewing), but even they can be replaced. Besides, I have pictures of the things I'd regret losing and have them backed up in several safe places so I can share the memories of them if not the actual object.

If we have too much stuff, we live in a cramped space, and don't have room for our other stuff.

Ummm, this just cracks me up! Whining about not having room for their stuff because they have stuff! Oh, dear. Yes. Well, moving on.

Too much stuff causes more messes and is harder to clean.
We might trip over stuff and hurt ourselves. If we don't trip over it, we must worry about that each time we pass by the item.

Oh, poor baby! Afraid of the stuff you own. If you're that afraid of stuff, chuck everything, and live in a padded room. Make sure your 2 changes of clothes and your slippers are slip-ons; wouldn't want you choking on a button or getting pinched by a zipper or breaking a fingernail on a Velcro tab!

If we went into debt buying the stuff, we must deal with all the pain and worry of that debt, added to other debt.

Well, and that's a lesson you young whippersnappers just need to learn, isn't it, to stop living beyond your means? Chalk that up to a learning experience and stop blaming your stuff for it. That stuff didn't force itself into your shopping basket, and you alone know what your income is and what you can afford. So if you buy more than you can reasonably pay for, you have to accept the consequences, deal with it, learn from it and hopefully, start living inside or below your income. That's pretty simple logic, too.

Even if we don't go into debt, there's the added burden of dealing with the financial transaction in our checking registers or financial software, or reconciling it with the bank statement. If we even bother, because sometimes it's just too much.

Oh, now you're just making things up to make it harder than it is. If you make it part of your routine and you're living within your income, that isn't so hard.

It gives us a false sense of security.

That depends. Are you surrounding yourself with hi-tech gizmos and doo-dads you have never bothered to learn how to use effectively and to their fullest potential? Then I'd agree with you. But if you learn how to use all your stuff, and learn how to do the same things manually without the stuff, then I doubt you'd feel a false sense of anything, let alone security. And ummmm, not all stuff is meant to make you feel safe. Some of it is meant to thrill you, excite you, challenge you.

It reduces the time we have to spend doing things, instead of worrying about, cleaning, maintaining, using, and working to pay for stuff.

I don't know what kind of stuff you are surrounding yourself with, but it sounds to me as if your problems are much deeper than mere things. My stuff makes it easier and faster for me to do things, and often to do them better than if I had to limp along without my stuff. Just try pruning a tree without a good set of tree pruning shears or chainsaw. Doing laundry without a washing machine. Mowing the lawn without a lawn mower. Gardening without shovels, rakes, hoes, weeders, pots, compost bins. Sewing without a sewing machine. Yes, it can all be done without stuff, but oh, it's so much easier and faster with them!

It reduces the quality of the time we do have.

Au contraire, mon frere. The moments I spend using my stuff effectively frees up much more of my time so I can spend it studying, visiting friends, entertaining, working on art projects, and doing the things I like doing. My stuff makes it possible for me to both work and enjoy life.

At some point, we must worry about (and spend time and money on) getting rid of the item. This means time and money spent on Ebay, Craiglist, a yardsale, giving it to a charity or friend or relative (and the driving required to do that), taking out a classified ad, dealing with buyers, and so on. A real headache.

Oh, you are really stretching here. It often takes less time to get rid of stuff than it took to get it. When my son finished a project he was working on, and he had 3 engines he'd used for parts left over, a few taps on the computer, and an hour later, someone with a trailer pulled up and hauled them off. My son made a profit from it, too.

If you die and leave your stuff, your relatives will have to deal with all of it. A real headache indeed.

This is called an "inheritance" and what you do with that stuff is the nearest relatives get to go through and take what they need and want from it, then the next nearest relatives, and so on, then if there's enough left, you call an estate broker, and they deal with everything else and hand you a check and a donation receipt (for tax purposes, assuming they donated items to charity) when they're done. Easy peasy.

If, goodness forbid, a natural disaster happens, or your home gets burgled, you'll have to deal with the emotional loss of stuff.

Dude, it's stuff. Antiques, family heirlooms and memorabilia might be irreplaceable, but their memory lives on and if you took pictures and backed them up, you'll still have the memories. If it's stuff you need, with insurance (or a nice savings account) and a job, you can replace it.

This person (or maybe it was compiled by a group of people, I'd rather think that than that one person was this paranoid, obsessive, and fearful) totally doesn't understand stuff. Or perhaps they are thinking of hoarders, a totally different level altogether.

Stuff can be very useful. Knowing you have the right tools for the types of things you do can be very calming and comforting. Using stuff can speed up the common tasks as well as the seasonal or rare tasks. I do agree that everything should have a place and it should be kept in that place when not in use: bins, shelves, drawers, jars, canisters, wall hooks, organizers, files, cabinets, closets, etc.

Home decorating items (what I affectionately call "dust collectors") are a matter of taste. I have a few. Most are seasonal and spend much of their time packed away waiting for their moment to shine. Most of them were gifts, and I when I unpack them, they provide pleasant memories. I have not kept all the gifts I've been given, some wore out, some were no longer needed, some were needed by someone else more, some were duplicates of what I already had, but I've taken pictures of the gift in use or on display so even though I no longer have the gift physically, I have it in essence. These dust collectors are what distinguish my house and make it a home, a place I enjoy returning to after work and enjoy entertaining friends in, a place where I pursue my hobbies and build my dreams.

You can't do that in a sterile environment. Or a house stripped down to the minimal housekeeping essentials.

I don't feel a house is a home without books, photos and art, works-in-progress, well-lived-in furniture, and a few kitschy items. Clutter is, in my opinion, a Good Thing for you (and your friends!) to have because it means (to me) that you have an active, involved life and you're not ashamed of living your life in your home.

A sterile house/apartment, where every surface is bare, the walls hold only generic art (if they have anything on them beyond a clock and a mirror), the minimal amount of furniture, which often translates to a huge TV and a sofa facing it, with a coffee table between holding only a remote centered precisely on it, and a small dining table with 2 chairs (there may or may not be a floral arrangement on it and that's usually artificial to avoid messes) all in neutral colors with no hint of the resident's personality and no hint that anyone actually lived there is a very sad house, to me. I would be very uncomfortable in a house like that, with nothing to look at, nothing to do, nothing to comment on except what might be showing on TV. The person sleeping there doesn't live there, or doesn't have a life.

There is a happy place between hoarder and spartan, and I inhabit that space. So do my friends.